


why do you always call me when you're high

by renhyuckore



Category: NCT (Band), We Go Up - NCT Dream (Music Video), Without You - NCT U (Music Video)
Genre: Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, College Students NCT Dream, Cute, Fluff and Angst, Lee Donghyuck | Haechan is Whipped, M/M, Mark Lee (NCT) is Whipped, Mark Lee (NCT)-centric
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-02
Updated: 2020-05-02
Packaged: 2021-03-02 00:33:24
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,618
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23956159
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/renhyuckore/pseuds/renhyuckore
Summary: they thought they were endgame, but everything crumbled when mark broke up with hyuck because of his love for parties, and weed maybe. but mark was still the one to call every night when they broke up. and hyuck always answered.
Relationships: Lee Donghyuck | Haechan & Mark Lee, Lee Donghyuck | Haechan/Mark Lee
Comments: 8
Kudos: 66





	why do you always call me when you're high

**Author's Note:**

> before reading : english is not my first language so bear with me if there is some mistakes, i tried my best and i proof read it but still:/ enjoy!!

it was almost 3am when donghyuck woke up from the sound of his phone ringing. ‘not again’ he thought when he saw the number calling, it was mark. he picked up.   
‘hyuckie! i missed you~’ donghyuck sighed, hearing this voice he knew too well never failed to leave him with feeling as if someone is pinching his heart. whenever mark called, hyuck always had hope, hope that the older was not at a random party, and that he actually did want to call donghyuck, but he was always disappointed, hearing loud music, and people having fun in the background. it hurt the younger feeling everytime. 

‘what do you want mark’ hyuck spat, annoyed. 

‘i just wanted to talk to the person i love the most, can i not do that?’ 

hearing those words, hyuck was hurt, he wasn't the one who broke up after all. and frankly, donghyuck was tired of waking up nearly every night to a drunk or high mark saying how much he loves him. donghyuck tried to block him, but he was always scared that something would happen, he was always the one who picked him up when they were still together after all. and deep down, hyuck was way too worried about what would happen if he blocked his ex number. and maybe he still cared a little bit too much. 

‘look mark, we already talked about this, you can't keep calling me like that, in the middle of the night, when you are drunk, or whatever the hell you might be doing.’ hyuck said, getting more and more annoyed, but we could still hear some sort of pain in his voice, he just wanted to move on, but with mark playing with his feelings like that, he just couldn't. 

‘i just really miss you hyuck...you were my everything” mark said, hyuck could hear sobs annoying him even more. 

‘well you should have thought about that before breaking my heart mark, we already talked about this, you should really stop calling me, especially at 3am.’ the tone was firm, hyuck was clearly done with mark’s games. he wanted to move on. mark was now full on sobbing, breaking hyuck's heart even more, why does he make everything so complicated? he hated hearing his ex cry, almost making him want to cry too. 

‘im sorry hyuck...i know i fucked up really bad, but let me make it up to you, i promise i can do better’ mark sounded really hurt, hyuck almost stopped everything and saying ‘i love you’, but mark wasn't in his right mind, he was high, he didn't mean anything he was saying right now, mark didnt even text when he was sober.

there was no way in hell he meant anything he was saying at this moment, it was just the effect of the drug, right ? hyuck stayed silent, lost in his thoughts, but he clearly heard the ‘i love you, always hyuck’ coming from the older mouth, he tried to act as if nothing happened, but hyuck was now crying too. 

‘mark, why do you keep doing that? you tell me you miss me every night, but i know for a fact that tomorrow you’ll act as if nothing happened, i don't fucking know if you remember anything, but i can't keep up like that, you hurt me every goddamn time i see your fucking name on my phone.’ hyuck was full on sobbing, having troubles to breathe, he really hated to be this vulnerable in front of someone, especially his ex. but mark was his weak spot, and hyuck was mark’s weak spot. 

‘im sorry hyuck…’ his voice was soft, calmer. we couldn't say the same for hyuck, he was done with whatever mark was doing to him. 

‘why the fuck are you only calling me when you’re high…’   
everything stayed silent for a while, we could only hear people partying in the background.  
‘you see mark, if you really cared, you wouldn't do that, you wouldn't have broken up with me in the first place, so please, i beg you, let me move on, let me be happy again. it's been months mark, let me forget you..’ hyuck hated himself for saying that, but he felt as if it was the only way for mark to finally leave him alone. 

their relationship was once perfect, everyone was jealous of them, we could see how much they cared about each other. but all good things have ends right ? they grew apart, mark started to party a lot, often ditching dates with hyuck so he could get drunk. hyuck being busy with uni, they didn't even see eachother often anymore. the younger always tried to do things with his lover, he tried everything, he always had hope, but the days, weeks, months passed and nothing passed. it got to the point where there was time where they couldnt see eachother for almost 2 weeks. 

hyuck was so tired of suffering, so he tried talking to mark, but mark always rejected the fault on hyuck. one night mark knocked at his ex’s door, and he told him that he didn't love him, that everything was fake. it shattered hyuck so much, he couldn't get up of bed for almost a week and his friends had to come to take care of him. hyuck truly believed they were endgame. but the weeks passed, hyuck started to finally get better, he didn't spent his day crying anymore, he started to join his friends when they were going out. he was starting to move on. but that’s when it started all over again. 

mark started calling hyuck every night when he was drunk. texting him. telling him how much he regretted everything he had done and that he ruined everything. that he was sorry. in the beginning, hyuck didn't even respond, but he gave up, the older being very persistent. he was now used to argue with his ex everyday on the phone in the middle of the night. but it was the first time he actually cried in front of him, hyuck blamed that on the fact that he was so tired. 

there was a long silence between the two, we could only hear hyuck’s sobs and loud music in the background. neither of them had the strength to hang up. long minutes passed and none of them was willing to talk, scared to ruin everything more. 

but mark finally decided to talk, probably the effect of the weed, sober mark would never have the courage to talk. but he was feeling brave, and determined to get his boyfriend back. mark always noticed how he hurt hyuck when they were still together, but he loved the feeling of not being sober, he loved how he could get away of reality, perhaps it was that that made him decide to break up. his love for alcohol and drugs, the truth was, one day hyuck came up to him and confronted him about his unhealthy love for drugs. he felt as if he had to decide between them or hyuck.so he decided to break up with him but he quickly realised that he probably lost the person he cherished the most on earth, and it hurt so bad. so maybe it was these feelings that pushed the older to call his ex everyday. but the day after, he would always regret, and maybe it was the dumbest decision he could ever make, but he ignored hyuck. and that just ended up hurting him more. both of them were a mess. 

‘hyuck...i hate hearing you cry’ mark broke the silence, his voice shaking, he was so worried about him. 

‘don't act like you care now mark.’ the younger snapped. he paused. ‘i know you don't. please leave me alone, it's the last thing i ask you..please let us forget, and be happy again. i can’t live like this forever mark. we can’t live like this. make up your damn mind.’ and he hung up. leaving both of them crying, hyuck in his bed, trying to sleep. and mark, well, he was miserable. alone, when everyone was dancing and enjoying themselves. 

he hated himself for ruining the best thing he ever had. he was a crying mess, he couldn't stop. he was alone, and to say the truth, he brought this upon himself. but don't you dare say that to him he will break down, his friends tried. they tried comforting him, but nothing worked. mark felt as if he was nothing without -his- hyuck. and the younger desperately wanted to move on, he was hurt so many times because of mark’s acting. but he just couldn't forget him, the perfect dates, all the beautiful memories they had together. when they went at the beach, and hyuck drew a heart in the sand and they made out in it. or when they went stargazing everytime hyuck was felt sad. they remember every touch, every kiss. everything was perfect with mark on his side. they both felt as if they could do anything and everything as long as the other was by his side. 

mark was crumbled up, with his head in between his legs, overthinking, he decided he’s had enough. the only thing he wanted is to have his boyfriend back, he did one of the most reckless thing he ever did. he called an uber, and without thinking, he went straight to his ex’s place. the ride was one of the most stressful he ever had, well the other was when he went to hyuck’s place to break up with him. he couldn't stop shaking his leg, hyuck would probably kick him out, or not even open the door. he had no idea at how donghyuck would respond, even if he knew the younger by heart. it would be a lie to tell you he wasn't scared. he was terrified. this night would change everything. whether the two would have the chance to start again, or the exact opposite. 

mark was now in front of hyuck’s door, scared to knock. he was stressed, scared of what the younger reaction would be. 

he knocked. no answer. ‘it is late’ mark thought, feeling stupid for thinking that he would answer and even if he did their meeting wouldn't go well no matter how much mark wanted it to be, so he left. but little did he know that hyuck opened the door right after he left, wondering why the hell someone knocked at his door at 4am. of course, the thought of it being mark crossed his mind, but he quickly erased that. ‘why would mark come here now, he had all the time in the world.’ and he rationalized thinking that maybe it was some drunk neighbor who mistook the apartment number or something. he didn't think much of it. and he tried going back to sleep, rather crying his eyes until he fall asleep, with the thought that maybe mark came to his house. 

for the next few days, everything was normal, almost too normal. but neither of them expected -that- to happen. hyuck recently started working at a coffee shop in the city. he was used to seeing people he knew there. but he didn't know that he would see his ex. especially when he tried his best to choose the place where mark was likely not going to enter. so when huck's manager told him to take the order for the lonely boy in the back of the shop, the shop was empty, with mark being the only customer of course, it would be too easy if he wasnt, but nevertheless he did not expected it to be mark, looking like a total wreck, waiting for his order to be taken. at first, they didn't recognize each other, mark not raising his head, and hyuck was not facing him. but when hyuck talked, mark knew that voice from a 1000 different ones. he froze, and the only thing he was capable of saying was : 

‘hyuck….’ and donghyuck knew exactly who it was. he didn't know what to do either, but he couldn't the mixed happiness he was feeling. he missed mark, and it broke the younger’s heart. mark turned his face and thought the exact same about donghyuck. but the truth was, they both looked like a total mess, their hair was messy, they had dark circle that they looked almost dead. hyuck tried to get away, but mark grabbed his hand. 

‘we need to talk hyuck.’ that sentence made hyuck froze, why the hell did mark want to that to his ex? was he high? was the only thing could think about. there was no way mark actually wanted to talk to him when he was sober. 

‘are you high mark?’ he finally said, kind of worried. 

‘do i have to be high to talk to you?’ mark scoffed. 

‘well don't get me started on that, mark.’ hyuck commentend. ‘anyway no i don't want to talk to you mark and you should know that better than me, when you were the one ignoring me.’ the younger started to get defensive. 

‘please hear me out, hyuck.’ mark was begging at this point. and he did the thing with his eyes where he looked like the most precious puppy on earth. and hyuck didn't know how to say no to them, he was weak for them. and he kind of hated himself for accepting to talk to him once his shift was over, which was only 1 hour, that let 1 hour to the 2 boys to prepare themselves for what was about to happen. whether they were going home happy, or with a heavy heart. 

the hour was stressful, the shop was almost empty, only with mark waiting, and shaking so much. behind the counter was a hyuck completely losing his shit. going around in the staff’s room, he thanked god the store was not crowded, he didn't have to come out and face -him-. but the hour eventually came to an end hyuck had to come out. it was an understatement to say that he wasn't completely freaking out. he didn't talk to mark face to face in months. and the last time they did was their break up. 

hyuck tried to collect himself before coming up to mark. he waved at him from afar and got out of the coffee shop. there was a little park and he sat down in the grass, waiting for marl who was following him. when they were both installed, everything was awkward, with none of them knowing how to engage the talk. it stayed like that for a few minutes. they would occasionally stare at the other before removing their gaze whenever the other would catch it. but none of them would talk, scared about the reaction. but they had so many things to say to each other. both of their hearts were going so fast, the 2 of them were scared the other would hear it. their feelings clearly hadn't changed. and hyuck wouldn't dare to admit it, but at this moment, he was dying to have mark’s hands in his. and maybe a hug, or a kiss. or maybe all of the above. he missed the older like crazy. and mark, well, he was so lost in his thoughts, he was thinking of the best way to say that he regretted everything, that he was an asshole, and that he’d do anything to get his lover back. but he knew hyuck too well to know that only saying that would not get him back. but hyuck broke the silence before him.   
‘this is awkward..’he said, mark was feeling so bad, everything was his fault. he laughed, uncomfortably. 

‘it is...i just don't know what to say exactly apart from “i'm sorry for being such an asshole” and i know this is the last thing you wanna hear right now donghyuck.’ the younger’s heart dropped as he thought to himself ‘so we’re back to using full names i see”. a little disappointed. 

‘yeah...you kind of said that to me a million times over the phone you know, i don't trust that one..’ hyuck paused for a little while. ‘i guess since i brought this one up, why the fuck do you keep calling me every fucking night.’ hyuck’s vocabulary was kind of harsh but he was pissed.

‘i just really miss you i guess…’ mark started, but hyuck was already getting kind of heated.   
‘so you you just miss when you’re high uh.’ 

‘no i fucking miss you every second of my life, i hated myself for the past few months for what i have done, you were the best thing in my life donghyuck. everywhere i go, i just see you. i remember everything, and yeah it is kind of cliché, but i just can't help myself, and i don't know what to say right now, i'm so scared of screwing up everything again. i hate myself for hurting you donghyuck, but what i hate more is the fact that i'm still being selfish, that i called you every night for so many days, yet you still answered, and now im in front of you and...god i don't know what to say.’ mark was tearing up a bit, but he tried his best to hide it, so hyuck wouldn't have to see.

‘hyuck.’ donghyuck said. the older looked up in confusion.   
‘please stop calling me donghyuck it hurts.’ mark smiled, maybe there was a chance ? maybe not everything was ruined...and maybe mark had hope.  
‘sorry..hyuck..’ mark smile got wider, he missed calling him hyuck.   
‘oh god please don’t make a big deal out of it.’ hyuck sighed. mark laughed, and it felt just like old times. when everything was still okay. 

‘i am not!’ mark paused, feeling a little bit more confident. ‘do you remember when we were at this store ?’ he proceeded to point out the said store. ‘we went there on our first date, we were so awkward..but when we got over out shyness we were so loud we almost got kicked out.’ they both laughed, enjoying their happy memories. everything got silent for a while, but not the awkward silence from the start. this one was almost..soothing in a way. 

they didn’t need words to understand the other. maybe they were both remembering all the good times they had with each other, and they couldn't help but think about how much they missed the other presence. and if the situation was different, they would probably kissing now. but hyuck ‘snapped’ back into reality. they had perfect memories, that was true, but in the end mark was still an asshole who broke his heart for his love for drugs. so yeah, he can’t forgive him that easily can he ? even when mark looked so sweet when he laughed, and don’t get him started on mark’s laugh, he would never shut up about it. and at how his eyes looked like they had stars in them whenever mark would talk about something he loves..and- ‘oh go i am whipped’ hyuck thought. but he brushed that thought.

he hurt him so bad, and even if there was a part of him that wanted to jump in his ex’s arms, he was also terrified of what could happen, hyuck was scared to be hurt all over again. mark on the other hand was determined to change, to be better ‘for hyuck’. but in the end, was it worth? wasn’t their relationship way too damaged to risk another shot. hyuck was so scared, and he thought that maybe memories were better of as it is. and maybe it wasn't worth to reopen wounds like that. but everything about mark was so endearing, from his beauty, to his personality, to the kisses...he just couldn’t forget them. and he just couldn’t brush off his feelings for the older. so maybe, if mark tried, they could be happy again. 

mark felt the tension going up. ‘you know, i’m so sorry for hurting you hyuck...i hated myself from that day, and i know i messed up so bad...i just miss you so much. and i am not asking for us to be like before, i just wanna be able to touch you again.’ 

donghyuck’s cheeks went red, mark was good with words, and, he still loved him. so the younger gave in, his chest was pounding. he took the older’s hand in his, and put his head against his shoulder. mark didn't need words to understand. they were in that position for minutes, both enjoying the presence of the other. they talked here and there, asking about how the other has been doing, but they were mostly quiet, enjoying the other’s touch, relaxing. they missed this so bad. they were scared to do more, scared that if they say or do something wrong, everything will be ruined again. so they just stood there, with their hearts beating so fast, and the undying want to kiss the other again. and hyuck, couldn’t take it. he missed how mark’s lips felt on his. like they were shaped for each other.   
hyuck stared into mark’s eyes, and they both knew. and before they knew it they were kissing like there’s no tomorrow, like it was the last kiss they could ever share. (it was the first of many others). yet the kiss was so gentle and soft, mark’s hands on his lover’s cheeks, and hyuck’s stroking mark’s hair. 

‘maybe everything will be okay’ they both thought.

**Author's Note:**

> thank you for reading this!! i hope you did like it and that it was not too boring, it is the first fic i'm publishing so sorry if there is any mistakes. ty for sticking up with it<3  
> if u wanna follow my twitter account @renhyuckore ! ty sm<3


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